My Parenting Style Might Differ From Your's And That's OK

I have been blessed to have a lot of friends have babies in the last year or so.  It's been so nice to have friends that I can text about the stresses of parenthood and to bounce ideas off of.  I am so happy that my sister is in that group as well.  Simple questions like, "What kind of foods did you introduce first?" Or "When did your baby drop the 2nd nap?" 

I have found that living in a state that I did not grow up in to be challenging with this new role.  While I am so happy to have family around, unfortunately I don't know a lot of people with babies here.  I have found that the culture is different than I'm used to here. I often find myself wondering, "Is this just a Utah thing?"  I know that I'm viewed strangely for subscribing to a lot of the attachment-style parenting.  I know that people think I'm an overprotective mom.  

What is attachment parenting?  "Attachment parenting is a parenting philosophy that proposes methods which aim to promote the attachment of parent and infant not only by maximal parental empathy and responsiveness but also by continuous bodily closeness and touch." Due to the nature of twins, obviously I cannot totally subscribe to all of the elements of attachment style parenting, but you have to do what works for you and your family, right?  

When I discuss my parenting style or "methods" with my friends, I feel so validated.  I feel like I am just a normal mom.  I like to keep my babies close.  It's a normal, biological response.  I like to know they are safe.  

I think a lot of the time I am viewed as not "allowing" people to "bond." Let me start off by saying, after reading a lot of psychology articles, parenting articles, and hearing other parents' experiences, I have come to the conclusion that the only bond that is of real importance during the first 12-18 months of life is the bond with the primary caretakers.  Creating a trusting environment between primary caretaker (whom I'll just refer to as "parents" from here on out) and baby is essential.  Parents are the nurtures, the comforters, the providers.  In short, parents are the baby's EVERYTHING.  

After 18-24 months, the child emerges out of the young toddler stage, and is hopefully a more confident and secure child.  The child is ready to fully enjoy those bonds with extended family and family friends.  The child is also able to do more activities.  Wouldn't you rather bond by playing with a toddler than trying to force a baby to be comforted by you?  

When my babies were first born, I felt bombarded and burdened by visitors.  I was stressed out.  I wanted a quiet home.  I wanted to be able to recover from my c-section

I'm not saying this all to upset anyone.  I'm not saying that you cannot disagree with me.  Some people are fine letting their baby cry in someone else's arms because they're "creating a bond."  I don't agree with that parenting style, but I recognize that my methods are not for everyone.